Category: Personal Responsibility

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the impulse to grow

When we become aware of the urge to expand our life and reach for our highest potential, and we feel unimpeded by our usual fears and timidity, that is the moment to act.

A bold and fearless response to the calling from our deeper Self to reach for more can set in motion habits and momentums that can carry us through those inevitable periods of doubt and dullness when we’re not so sure, after all, whether we’re really up for the challenge.

Expanding our effectiveness and success in life requires us to go beyond where we are normally inclined to stop and pull back. In the bypassing of our old stopping points, we gain a new perspective on what is possible for ourselves and our life.

Embracing and stabilizing that new level of being in the world brings fresh insights and unforeseen opportunities which must be met with a willingness and a readiness to receive and to act.

We must be willing to shake off the old fears, challenge the old self-limiting cognitive schemas, and extinguish old less-than-optimal behavioral patterns in order to make room for new feelings of inspiration, new levels of accomplishment, and updated, accurate, encouraging self-appraisals, as our increasingly effective behavioral repertoire expands.

This will eventually become “the  new normal” from which we can reach even higher.

This is so much better than giving in to the regressive pull of lowered aims, feelings of discouragement, and desires to escape, when the intensity of “the high” has receded and dropped us back into the lap of the day-to-day grind of real life.

What is required of us is to really want it.  And then,…to do the work.

Even when we don’t feel like it.

Just keeping the small, positive momentums going. Consistency is key.

Starting again every morning. With focus and persistence.

And soon enough, once again, we will be filled with inspiration, positive self-regard and determination to prevail.

This is pretty much how it works, in a nutshell.

This is how we can get from where we are to where we want to be in life.

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Organized and Consistent

Being organized makes up for a lot.

It makes us “smarter” than we are because it makes it possible to track and follow through on things – to get things done – which otherwise seem to overwhelm our ability to handle complexity (which has natural limits).

Consistency makes up for a lot.

Doing a little bit toward our goal(s) every day can get a healthy habit established and build momentum to carry us through those inevitable times of less motivation.

Being organized and consistent – as a way of approaching ones’ life – can result in extraordinary success for “ordinary” people.

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After all, it’s always now.

It’s so easy to fall into the trap of putting off the positive changes we want to make in our lives until a future date.

“After this weekend.”  “After the Holidays.”  “After…”

While we see (and know) where we want our future self to end up, we keep choosing what doesn’t take us there.  Our future self is derailed by our current choices.

“I’ll start eating healthier, exercising more, drinking less alcohol, spending less time on social media, being a ‘nicer’ person, meditating everyday, saving more of my money, working on that big project, paying down my credit card, …”

What’s important and helpful to remember is that choices are always (and only) made in the present moment.  (It’s always the present moment, right?)

“After this party.”  “After this/that is behind me.”  “After…”

When we put these decisions to change off until a later date, and that later date finally arrives, what we find is that we are, once again face-to-face with our current self, and with having to muster the willpower (energetic determination) to choose and act on what we know will make our future self happy.

Maybe it will be easier at this point.  Sometimes it is.

But too often it is no easier than it would have been before.

It’s still now.  It’s once again now.  The choice and effort must always be made now.

Otherwise we just keep kicking the problem “down the road” of time, and the compounding effects of poor choices mount up and snatch success away from our future self.

We have not only lost time, but we have also failed to establish the habits and momentums that would have made this moments’ choices easier.

“Crap I gained another pound.”  “Dang, I should’ve started on this assignment sooner.”  “Hmm, I should have looked further ahead.”

In the end (and always) we must choose and act now.  Not in the future.  Right now. Today.  Take a small step, and then another.  That’s all it takes to get our lives moving in the directions that we know are best for us.

Why not now?

After all, it’s always now.

 

 

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Luck is a factor

“She’s so lucky.”

“Everything comes so easy to him.”

While luck is a factor in life, it’s not the only one, nor is it one over which we have any control.  (That’s what makes it luck, right?)

We do, however, have some measure of control over our thoughts, feelings and behavior.

We do have some measure of control over where we place our attention and how we respond to the circumstances and challenges of our life.

Interestingly, we can increase our own experience of being “lucky” by careful planning and preparation, cultivating constructive attitudes and self-talk, learning to recognize opportunities when they do come our way, and then acting – without hesitation – on those opportunities that advance our life in the direction of our goals.

Luck?

“He’s such a lucky guy.”

“Everything seems to come so easy to her.”